International Widow’s Day

I have always had an aversion to the word “widow” based on my previous experiences-associated with “the black widow” or other evil, poisonous associations. But, today, I was taken by an article suddenly appearing for my viewing from CNN, regarding stories expressed today by various “widows” throughout the world, regarding what it means to experience this sudden or forced entrance into the world of “widowry”.

I never had any desire of any sort to be a member of this group. I empathized frequently with friends, neighbors, etc. who were suddenly thrown into this distant group. But, I had never envisioned myself as an actual member.

I read the stories today with great interest. Though each of these ladies’ circumstances were so very different from mine, I did engage in a certain camaraderie with this group of women, who had never planned on partaking of this adventure, and had never envisioned life without their spouses (in my case, the absence of my best friend and partner of my soul).

I was blessed with six months to prepare for Billy’s death, though the unknown of the details of the arrival of “death” throughout those months, resulted in mental anguish and much turmoil, inhibiting our supposed preparation for that dreaded event.

In reading each of the stories of these “hero women” in this article, I realized the blessings of family in my situation, occurring in stark contrast to many of the painful, judgmental experiences of these women within their own cultures across the world. Some of these women experienced cruelty, rejection, and/or humiliation from family members, as a result of becoming a widow. This circumstance appears unimaginable in our culture, but it was a recurrent theme within the stories of the other women throughout the world. Unfortunately, many of us shared the themes of death and cancer in common. But, the reactions of cultural bias painted the darkest contrast in our situations.

I am thankful, that in my situation, I was graced with the enveloping of love from extended family members throughout our difficult journey of illness, comforting me still. However, this article has made me realize the importance and relevance of our reaching out to expand, understand, and assist women throughout the world, regardless of their circumstance, to successfully survive the frightening phenomenon of suddenly being a “widow”.

Therefore, I am attempting to change my perspective on being considered a part of this “widow” group. I find myself, now, being quite proud to join their ranks, being able to say “I was Loved so deeply” by my spouse and my family, and I am now aware of the circumstances of cultural change within the concept of “widow”, that all of us need to address in the future.



37 years

37 abundant moments

37 pauses and reflections of enduring love

37 enriched memories-two, as one



Discussions of wisdom and truth


Boys pure and delightful; creations of wonder

Family; four together; never to be separated

Always one for all and all for one

Love conquers all

Love endures

Love seemingly gone in a flash, but etched in our minds and hearts forever.

Love eternal

                                                                                                                     Terry Grosvenor                                                                                                                                      May 15, 2017


Last week in Dallas, I had the pleasure of accompanying my “daughter” and first grandson to the local library for “Baby Time”.  At 4-months, you might expect him to be unaware of anything beyond his immediate surroundings.  However, in observing B. from the perspective of my long career in Early Childhood and Speech Pathology, I was elated, to see him attending to every book read aloud to the children and to every puppet, responding with smiles and squeals.  Following the story time, I took B. to the children’s section of the library, picked out a wonderful, interactive board book called “Woof-Woof”, and read it two times to him.  Once again, he was quite attentive!  While we were reading, B.’s mother was at the desk, obtaining B.’s first library card.  As you can see from this picture, he is very aware of the significance of his “ticket to the world of knowledge”!





Memorial Weekend, 2016

Remembering my daddy today & those families who have served, those families who have lost, and those who continue courageous service and sacrifice for our country. As I watch the Memorial Weekend celebration on KERA, I remember part of my daddy’s story– every Christmas without fail, my daddy received a beautiful fresh fruit package from a fellow navy crewman, who remained anonymous to us, but who thanked my daddy repeatedly for saving his life. We never knew the details of their story, and it doesn’t matter, really. We saw presence of deep emotion, and remembrance in Daddy’s eyes every time he received this gift. Daddy (Paul McGlothing), you will forever be my hero, and you honored the U.S. Navy with your presence and service.🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

Diamond Doves (the Peacemakers)

“diamonds on the soles of my shoes”                   “diamonds are a girl’s best friend”

“Lucy in the sky with diamonds”

Our gentle, cooing Diamond Doves have laid one egg today.  We await the arrival of a possible second.  The female and male take turns sitting on the egg, which lies upon a very thin nest in their basket, put together by the two of them at the last minute!  We miss their daily coos, as their minds appear to be elsewhere today.  However, they are so interesting to observe during this “miracle moment” of sorts.  What wonderful pets; with the right kind of cage, they are not messy at all and provide a constant source of peaceful sounds, adding tranquility to our daily environment, as well.


What we need to teach our children…

One of the most important and powerful behaviors to model for our children is the art of resilience–being able to bounce back, reorganize and start again. In these days of reacting without thought, the ability to negotiate problems is also something families can practice and model in the home for our kids. The author of this article says it so well in describing the additional need for parents to recognize when it is timely, necessary and beneficial to help our children learn a skill in order to be more successful in life, organization, socialization, etc. Parenting is difficult, but modelling resilience, balance, negotiation and skill-learning in ourselves can ease the life journey for our children!

sunflowers and soul


The quotation above is from Nelson Mandela – one of the greatest leaders and teachers of all time & certainly of our time. He knew all about the importance of human resilience and modelled it to the rest of us throughout his extraordinary life…

There is a trend in today’s society to do what they call ‘helicopter parenting…’ I have been guilty of this exact thing at times, when my son was younger, but am increasingly learning that it doesn’t serve the child or the parent to make this a permanent state of being

When we take away a child’s right to choose their response to bumpy situations, we take away their opportunity to learn – an opportunity to stretch their boundaries of understanding and their perspective on the world…

So which parent are you…?

The one that teaches your kids that life is ‘perfect’, smooth and shiny &…

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February 12, 2014 Goodbye My Friend, Our “ShoebeDoo”

How do you say goodbye to someone who has been so faithful and sweet for 18 years of your lives?  Our dear cat, Snowshoe, died today. We loved him so very much.  Linda Rhonstadt sang a song years ago written by Karla Barnoff:  “Goodbye, My Friend”, that touches upon many of my feelings on this day:

Oh we never know where life will take us                                                                                                    
I know it’s just a ride on the wheel
And we never know when death will shake us  
 And we wonder how it will feel        

So goodbye my friend    
I know I’ll never see you (here) again
But the time together through all the years       
Will take away these tears                
It’s okay now
          Goodbye my friend

I’ve seen a lot of things that make me crazy       
And I guess I held on to you
We could’ve run away and left well maybe  
But it wasn’t time and we both knew

So goodbye my friend
I know I’ll never see you (here) again
But the love you gave me through all the years
Will take away these tears
I’m okay now
Goodbye my friend

Life’s so fragile and love’s so pure
We can’t hold on but we try
We watch how quickly it disappears
And we never know why

But I’m okay now
Goodbye my friend
You can go now
Goodbye my friend

I found Snowshoe as a kitten at our local humane society. Someone had loved him, also, as he was inside a pretty cage with toys, etc.
A snowshoe Siamese with beautiful blue eyes; loved to play; loved children; loved being around family; loved lying about on my scrapbooking table, playing with papers, etc.; loved playing with Kramer, the Cockatiel, Molly, Buttons012 Snowshoe

3205 Snowshoe

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Terry's Camera 04042009 272 Snowshoe

Terry's Camera 04042009 278 Snowshoe & Maxwell; loved watching and patting real snow tigers on the television (even looking behind the television for them); loved eating (panicked if his food didn’t totally cover the bottom of the bowl); loved doing “the bug dance” around an intended prey; loved warming himself on the computer wi-fi box; loved roaming under the birdfeeders and irritating his squirrel friends by sitting below them up in the tree; loved being with me; loved climbing up in my lap out on the porch; loved being outside in the yard or garden with me; my friend…….my soulmate……a bright light in my heart. Snowshoe was part of our family….Billy, Brandon, Brett & Leanna loved him, also. His “Mew-Mew”, rubbing his head against us, and his sweetness will always be remembered by all of us.

On the Subject of DREAMS

I rarely discuss my dreams.  However, I found last night’s dreams to be quite interesting.  To set the scene for one of my dreams, my mother is an amazing lady in her 90’s, who lives quite independently outside of Austin on beautiful Lake LBJ.  Her faithful companion, since the death of my father, has been a delightful Pomeranian, named Riley.  One could say that Riley has definitely acquired  “the life of Riley” from living with my mother. They adore one another.  Riley is 14 years old and has numerous anomalies which make his life more difficult at this point, such as poor hearing, poor eyesight, allergies, violent coughing, and occasional listless behavior. However, with all of Riley’s old age problems, he still takes wonderful care of my mother.  Recently, my mother’s three children, including me, have been discussing how to best care for her if needed in the future, since all of us live quite a distance.  Of course, my mother has no desire to leave her home or her sweet Riley.  So, last night, I dreamed about my mother and I searching for a new puppy for my mother on a huge beach.  There were numerous people on the beach selling very odd-looking puppies of all ages and sizes.  Of course, no matter how many possible puppies I found for her, none of them could ever begin to replace her Riley.  A very appropriate dream, I think.


DSC_0804_edited-1My second dream was quite interesting to me and one that I continue to reflect upon in my “spare time”.  If you have ever had a seemingly positive friend relationship explode on you, you might be able to relate to this dream.  The friend, in question, appeared at our door.  The conversation was quite cordial.  Apparently, we were standing on a second-story balcony, looking our over a huge forest and large grassy area.  Our family members and pets were down in the grassy area.  Suddenly, there was an explosive sound and a female lion came bounding out of the woods.  I was trying to warn my boys about the lion, and was very concerned about them.  Somehow, Brandon and Brett ended up donning hammers to defend themselves from the lion.  I was so worried about the boys, but also found myself eventually feeling sorry for the lion being “hammered” on the head.  I found myself feeling as though the lion had escaped from a zoo unexpectedly and had no intention of hurting anyone.  I remember being in quite the conundrum about the entire situation.  Similar feelings to those I have been feeling about the situation with “our friend”-precisely!

JIGSAW the PUZZLE: CONNECTING with your TEENS by Terry Grosvenor

IMG_2714Are you needing a way to encourage your teenagers to talk about their day?  Would you like them to share some thoughts with you, besides what they would like you to buy at the grocery store for them to eat?  Bring back the jigsaw puzzle and         COME TO THE TABLE.   Provide a few empty chairs and sit down yourself.  If you are able to place the puzzle in a spot near where your teens occasionally pass by, you will soon find them pausing to pick up puzzle pieces that catch their eyes,  or searching for elusive pieces that fit those empty spots.  Soon, your teens will take a seat themselves, in order to pause a little longer.  As they work the puzzle beside you, sit silently yourself for a bit and you will discover that soon  they are commenting about the puzzle or talking to you.  Connect to their statements with your responses.  Avoid asking them questions at first, join the conversation,  and listen to the magic.  It WORKS!


And, yes, boys,  our pets are still eating the pieces that fall on the floor!

Remembering Avonne

Avonne Johnson—-May you forever rest—-August 28, 2012
When Bill and I first met Avonne, she was living in her home with her “sweet baby boy, Buttons”,
amidst all of her instruments (piano, accordion, mandolin, fiddle, etc.) and huge scrapbooks full of family pictures, with radio and television programs blazing with rhetoric from conservative talk show hosts. Greeting us at the door every week, as we delivered her meals, took much effort, but Avonne always met us with a smile and a welcome into her home. Avonne loved company and loved to visit. However, Avonne’s visiting was not empty conversation. Avonne always shared her thoughts, opinions and intelligent ideas. Avonne was quite spirited and well-spoken when she discussed her beliefs and love of her family. Her entire family was musically inclined and she spoke often of their music nights at home, singing and playing instruments. I guess one of the reasons we became such good friends, is that I could always understand her and knew what a fine person she was, when many others could not readily understand her speech and perhaps, judged her too quickly, based solely on her disability-a visibly deformed spine. Bill and I found it difficult to shorten our visits with Avonne, as we loved her stories and fell in love with her sweet spirit! She adored her Buttons, an elderly Shitzu, and despite all of the challenges he presented her with, she loved him as her child! Buttons had a huge bin full of doggy toys, that squeaked, talked, etc., as well as every catalog doggy designer cloak available!! Buttons dined on people food, lovingly mixed with his dog food by his Mama, Avonne. Our relationship with Avonne grew over the next two years. As it became more and more difficult for Avonne to care for her own needs, we noticed that Buttons had become very ill, as well. A decision had to be made for Avonne to leave her home for a nursing and rehab. center, at which point, Bill and I took Buttons to our local veterinary clinic. Buttons was very ill, but following a few weeks of treatment, he regained his strength and acted more like his active, barking self. I took Buttons to visit Avonne on the north side of town, as often as my work schedule allowed. Avonne loved seeing Buttons and enjoyed introducing him to everyone at the center. All Avonne wanted was to be back in her home with Buttons. Eventually, she was moved to a care center close to our home, making Button visits more frequent. Avonne joined her family on August 28, 2012 and the graveside services were held in a small cemetery in Clyde, Texas. Those of us attending included her family’s preacher, Weldon, my husband Bill and me, the Diaz family who had cared for Avonne’s sisters in the past, Avonne’s friend Bobby and husband, a distant cousin Sharon and friend, and 3 out-of-town friend-previous neighbors of Avonne’s. Fifteen of us, a makeshift pulpit, and a small cd player—very simple—very sweet—very Avonne! I miss Avonne so much and think of her on a daily basis. Occasionally, Buttons stands by the door, looking up at me as if he has forgotten, we no longer make our visits. It is so very hard to let go of a friend you came to love.
I am sure, Avonne is at peace, playing her accordion and piano, as her family plays fine music together! I will remember you, always.

Fall, 2011

Thus far this month I have:
Enjoyed a road trip With my sweet mama,
Celebrated the 90th birthday of my Aunt D.D.,
Reunited with “the three girls” of my childhood,
Enjoyed joyful times with family,
Called 91-year-old Judge Bob (the fishing buddy of my childhood), listening to him talk with joy and sadness about his sweet wife and our Peggy; telling us about sharing family dinner in Peggy’s honor with my best friend, Janie and her husband Bob at “The Country Squire”, a familiar place from my past,
Celebrated the 4 inches of rain and prayed for Baby Cade,
Cried sweet and painful tears for my friends and their
families, gifted with holding beautiful baby Cade for one precious hour of life,
Walked miles feeling Fall’s first breaths,
Cheered for my boys’ excitement in experiencing the Texas Ranger’s wins,
Enjoyed telephone visits and “texting” with my family,
Endured the barking of Buttons through the thunderstorms,
Rocked our Molly May nearing the end of her Fall season,
And shared good reads and pumpkins with my sweet Billy!

Fall, 2011 brings a mixture of pleasure and pain, moving me forward.

Missing for Months

I’ve been missing for months on blogging.  What has been happening in my life?  Working at what I love best-assessing young children’s communication abilities, and as of November 8th–emergency room visits with my sweet husband, Bill and three surgeries to follow.  We are definitely on the up-side of all of this and so thankful for his improving health.  It is a slow journey, and therefore teaches us patience.  In my usual style, after getting 20 of our 72-year-old windows replaced, I dove into replacing window curtains, etc.,my fast action resulting in nothing but total chaos, until I persisted slowly and got it right.  Today is a milestone, as BG wanted to cook chili again.  My chef is back, though I now have much more respect for his time and effort and will gladly go to the store!  It looks simply delicious and I am SO HUMBLED by his healthy presence with me on this cold, Texas night!

Porch Sitting

It’s been done on Riverside Boulevard since 1938, with a yellow light–a bit different with the addition of a ceiling fan, but the same yellow light and rocking chairs, with the vision of my grandfather and ultimate soft whisper of a waterfall!!  Cool and fresh-making in the hot summer wind; chiminea warm and embracing  in Autumn.

There is NOTHING BETTER!    Lovin’ it!!


We are not sure where this started, but it had to have started at Ghiradelli’s Chocolates on Fisherman’s Wharf.

Leanna May and I had a great time the entire trip, yelling CHOCOLATE, whenever we were EXTREMELY HAPPY!!!!  So, whenever you need a boost, JUST DO IT!!

Love using my Palm-Pre as a Video Camera!

This new technology is absolutely AMAZING!  I received a notice from Palm that all I had to do was push a button on my phone to update and I would now be able to use it as a video camera.  I said to myself, “Yeah, right!”, but it actually worked.  So sorry to repeat for you all who have seen my pet movies on Facebook, but I wanted to add them here for historical purposes.  It is SO MUCH FUN and the quality is better than the still pictures on my phone.  I’ve been working hard these past two weeks;;;;looking towards Spring Break!!  I do enjoy my job though, I must say!  For those of you who don’t know, I’ve gone back to work after retirement as a Diagnostic Speech-Language Pathologist for Abilene ISD-lovin’ it!!!